|
|
Post by Shannon Feilding on May 25, 2010 15:14:55 GMT -5
It had been a quiet day, but the red head had been worried. She'd been unable to get Kelly out of her mind. The little girl haunted her. She could see her everywhere, and this day had been particularly bad. She found herself wondering about so manythings. One of them, that really worried her, was if Jethro really loved her... Things had changed after Kelly's death... so much.
She was sitting on the couch with all three cats around her, as she cryed quietly to herself, trying to push away the horrible thoughts.
|
|
|
|
Post by gibbs on May 25, 2010 18:45:22 GMT -5
L. Jethro Gibbs [/i][/font][/size][/color] Never thought it'd be a day
That I don't love you anymore
Baby its a shame to see, [/right]
He froze up a moment seeing her in tears before he padded over to sit next to her. He hated it when she cried, it made him feel like something he did wrong really mattered to her, which this might actually be the case here. He was still decent to her, he always had been. She was too kind a woman and he had done many things wrong to her. He looked to her as he stroked one of the cats. Are you going to tell me whats wrong?" he dared to ask softly.
He was wondering if he was too weak under her to actually admit he didn't love his wife anymore. He set his eyes to the ground placing a hand on her back softly. He didn't know what to think. It had been so easy to tell Jennifer in that elevator that he could do this but it wasn't about to be the easiest thing he did in his life, if he even went through with this. His thoughts ran through his encounters with Jen. They were just both of them letting out stress, he didn't know what was what anymore. Everything in his world had been turned upside down these days. Shannon and Jenny both weighed on his own mind at the moment. He was caught in the middle trying to balance the scales.
[/font][/blockquote] |
|
|
|
Post by Shannon Feilding on May 26, 2010 13:30:02 GMT -5
Shannon heard Jethro come up, but didn't answer right away. She tried to anyways. "It's nothing really. Just to many m-memories." she managed. Taking deep breaths to calm herself down. She felt his hand, and for a second was comforted.
She frantically pushed away the memory of when he came back from Paris, and was so happy. He was much more relaxed, calmer, etc. Damn memories. She thought angrily, which helped get rid of her tears a bit. She wasn’t stupid. She’d seen his reactions around Jenny, when she’d gone to NCIS when she was Director. Shannon just hadn’t wanted to believe it. Now she was slowly realizing exactly how idiotic she was being. She turned to look at him, gaining a few bad looks from the cats. ”Do you really love me?”
|
|
|
|
Post by gibbs on May 26, 2010 19:04:43 GMT -5
L. Jethro Gibbs [/i][/font][/size][/color] If we gotta start sometime I say now
Through the fog there is hope in the distance
Two worlds collide in a beautiful display [/right]
His heart fell as he heard her words, he hugged her gently, not daring to kiss her to give her mixed signals. "You are a wonderful woman Shannon and I don't hate you, but I don't know if I am in love with you anymore, I am not trying to hurt you, but I just don't know alot of things anymore" he said looking down at the ground. He felt horrible at the moment he did, as he should.
It wasn't that he meant to hurt Shannon because she such a wonderful woman, just perhaps not the woman that was right for him. "I never lied to you Shannon, When I met you and I married you. I loved you, I loved every smile you gave me everytime you came home with an animals and tried to get me to keep it. I still love everything about you. Its just I don't I am IN love with you" he was trying to explain himself and was perhaps digging himself a deeper hole.
He bit his lip as he looked to his wife. He couldn't get Jen out of his head but he wasn't going to mention her to Shannon, if she brought it up he would merely deny it to Shannon. He didn't want to hurt her anymore than he had to. He held her softly as he spoke, he didn't pull away. He was trying to protect her from himself and that never worked well in the end. It had been the only thing he couldn't protect her from in the end was him.
[/font][/blockquote]" |
|
|
|
Post by Shannon Feilding on May 27, 2010 11:51:51 GMT -5
Shannon could hear the confusion, and that only made her feel worse! She sighed softly, pulling away from his hug. So her suspicions were right. For some reason that didn't make the red head feel any better. She closed her eyes for a second listening to him speak. "Ain't that confusing." she murmured. She looked at him, and his blue eyes. "I know you never lied to me, Jethro. But you haven't told the whole truth either." she said softly, finally some anger flaring up in her green eyes. Something besides self pity.
She stood up, moving to the window. Looking outside, she tired to shut down the anger. There was no point in fighting for him. Jenny had his heart now... and when he chose to do something it got done.
|
|
|
|
Post by gibbs on May 27, 2010 20:36:04 GMT -5
L. Jethro Gibbs [/i][/font][/size][/color] If we gotta start sometime I say now
Through the fog there is hope in the distance
Two worlds collide in a beautiful display [/right]
"Its not fair to you and its even more unfair for me to not let you have a chance to be happy. It's entirely up to you where we go from here. I never meant to hurt you." he stated as he watched her wander to the window. He wanted to be able to tell her that he still loved her. But that would be a lie and he couldn't bring himself to lie not to her. Omit the truth? Yeah we he had done that. He just passed off that statement as she said it, he didn't need to confirm her suspicions on that one. Course he wasn't exactly in a position to Deny them at the moment.
He bit his lip as she spoke. He didn't want to explode on her, but his emotions were building underneath. He looked to his wife, knowing it wasn't fair to live a lie and pretend he was in love with her. He came over to her side after a moment. "I will still always be here for you. You haven't done anything wrong." he stated knowingly. He didn't think it would make her feel better but at least getting that out in the open was admiting his fault without admiting it. He never admitted fault to Jenny at all ever. But Shannon for some reason was different.
He finally decided that he had to do what he had been putting off. He slipped off his wedding ring and put it in her hand. "You deserved someone so much better than me" he said almost at a whisper. There was a hint of sadness in his eyes as he handed her the ring. He was still upset for her, but one couldn't help what his feelings would or would not dictate.
He padded away from her side and back to where he had been sitting earlier. He put his head in his hands. Not from self-pity but more for thinking purposes. He didn't speak he kept his thoughts to himself. He was upset with himself. Upset with himself for falling for Jennifer. Shannon didn't deserve this, she was just the person caught in the downdraft of it all. "Sorry can never ever express my feelings Shannon.' he said almost hoarsely.
With those words he went down to his basement, he needed to get his mind off of things. He needed to discuss things with her later but right now she knew she might need time to herself. He didn't know if she was capable of carrying a grudge for any length of time, but this was definitely a big reason for one.
[/font][/blockquote] |
|
|
|
Post by Shannon Feilding on May 28, 2010 11:21:30 GMT -5
Shannon didn't say anything. He made his choice, and she hated it, but she'd live with it. She turned away from him as he handed her his ring. She just stared down at it for a moment. "I'm sorry too." she said just as he left the room. What to do next? She wanted to cry, and just poor out her tears, but not now. She had to get out. yes... That was the only option. She'd probably stay at her mother's until she got herself settled.
She was trying to think through her grife, and not deal with her eomtions, because once she did she'd be crying for days and she knew it.
|
|
|
|
Post by gibbs on May 28, 2010 15:40:59 GMT -5
L. Jethro Gibbs [/i][/font][/size][/color] I Know Karmas
Comin To Pay Me Back
Im With The Sweetest
Thang Thats On The Map
I Broke Her Heart
In 30 Seconds Flat[/right]
..Time skip...
He came up from the basement, he was going to go to Jen's after this but him and Shannon still needed to talk. "You can have the house or I'll set you up an apartment in the city until you find work." he stated slipping some of her hair back looking in her eyes. He still cared about her that was evident as he spoke. "We don't have to make this any harder than its already going to be on both of us" he said knowingly. He knew he had just broken her heart and he wasn't about to scream and yell at her like he did with most people.
He sighed a moment as he sat down near her. He looked to her eyes a moment. "Don't take this so hard on yourself" he added gently as he looked to her, he wanted so much to just fix all her wounds but he knew that was impossible.
[/font][/blockquote] |
|
